majesticaljeff:

    rednecktex:

    huffy-lemon:

    Favorite story posts part 1

    That last one

    My dad says the ‘making love in a canoe’ about american beer

    (via lemartian)

  1. My boys side chick just posted a pic of her sucking his dick on Instagram and tagged his girl smh. This nigga is sitting in my living room mad quiet with his head in his hands

    thahalfrican:

    image

    (Source: modestmojo, via woahcecileeswoah)

  2. dollsofbeauty:

    pxeticarts:

    SHE SAID IT.

    Brooooo

    (via woahcecileeswoah)

  3. awwww-cute:

    My girlfriend’s rat dog doesn’t let me poop in peace

    (via praying-rebengel)

  4. (Source: ruinedchildhood, via academy)

  5. hinder:

    it is actually really sweet when someone stays up late to talk to you

    (Source: sprout, via deea4u)

  6. (Source: bhrimilian, via unteens)

    mbrequested:

    Damn Ray,that ass FAT! lol😂😩

    (via mindlessbehaviorfan143)

  7. (Source: fckyounate, via vsvpshay)

    idontcareforgob:

    officialgarrusvakarian:

    we-are-star-stuff:

    zerostatereflex:

    An Octopus unscrewing a lid from the inside.

    Octopuses are going to kill us all someday

    I had a biology teacher that told us this story about an octopus at an aquarium in Australia. The staff were concerned because their population of crustaceans kept disappearing. No bodies or anything. So they checked the video feed to find out what’s up.

    Across from the the crustacean tank was a small octopus tank. This little fucker squeezed out of a tiny hole at the top of his tank, walk across the hall, and get into the crustacean tank. He would then hunt and eat. After he was done, he crawled back out and get back in his tank

    Here’s the kicker: security guards patrolled the area. The staff realized that the octopus had memorized the security’s routine. It would escape and be back between the guards’ round.

    An octopus in Germany was annoyed by a bright light shining into his tank, so he climbed up over the rim and squirted water at it to short it

    Fuckin’ octopuses, man. 

    (via woahcecileeswoah)